So he has his days– he cries for no reason and refuses to sit on the toilet and occasionally stomps his feet and uses his devil-voice when things aren’t going his way (you know what I’m talking about, the one where you think for a second he might be possessed, that one). Maybe this is the definition of a bad kid to someone. I know that 2 years ago, I might have felt the same. But it’s just not true. People put too much criticism and judgement on kids (and their parents) based on how they act 5-10% of the time.
Since I used to be one of those people who saw a screaming kid at the store and thought “what a brat” I am going to elaborate on why this is TOTALLY bogus and why my perspective has completely changed. First of all, kids are learning. They don’t come out tha womb knowing all of their manners believe it or not, and I bet you you were once that screaming kid at the store until you learned otherwise. They literally don’t know how to control their emotions or how to react to them. Once kids start to understand things more, like what “no” means, it can be especially hard for them to react in an appropriate manner. Imagine how it makes you feel to be told no. You feel shut down, and maybe a little sad or frustrated, but you continue on with your life and get over it because you know better than to scream and cry and flail your arms. Give these kids a BREAK. They are learning how to be respectful, emotionally stable adults one tantrum at a time. (And if they aren’t respectful emotionally stable adults when they grow up, I am making a bold prediction that they were not given the opportunity to throw tantrums and were rather never told no, and therefore never learned.) I was one of those people judging you and your kids throwing fits in the store, and honestly probably still would be if I never had a child. What a joke it is to go into parenting thinking you won’t ever have the kid that throws a fit at the store! LOL It’s just not realistic y’all.
This post got sidetracked and was supposed to be about how GREAT J is despite his 10% of yucky behavior. Sometimes I want to pull my hair out and bang my head against the wall when J cries over every little thing and wants me to hold him all day, but then something magical happens. He gives me kisses and hugs in public, or he holds my hand in his sleep. He giggles until he toots or vise versa. I try to gently sneak my arm out from under his neck after he falls asleep and as soon as I move, he lays on my chest on hugs me tight so I am unable to leave. He lays in my lap and watches Shrek, without squirming for ten minutes straight. Even watching him learn new things, like where his belly-button is and where the ice cream is at make my day a little brighter. Little moments like this just make me so happy and thankful to be a mom to the most kind-hearted boy I’ve ever known.
Earlier I was talking to my mom about one of these little moments that make my heart stop and tears roll. She said:”That’s how you know you’re doing parenting right. When they know how kiss and hug and love.” And she’s right. Teaching my Little how to love is the most important thing he will learn in his life. Everyday I pray that I don’t mess up this parenting thing, as I’m sure a lot of parents do, but today was one of the first days in months that I felt confident in my parenting.